Sex can become a routine and lose all its magic, sparks, and pleasure. Surprisingly, this happens more often than you think, as couples tend to take sex for granted and don’t even engage in foreplay. It is why today we outline the top expert-supported tips on foreplay, including ideas, techniques, and games to try with your partner. We’ve found these to be very effective in igniting passion and intensifying pleasure.
What Is Foreplay?
All the things that happen before sex can be considered foreplay. It can be anything that sparks your flame – dirty texts, make-out sessions, dirty talking, or even heavy petting. It is the action that gets the body prepared for sex, as the increased arousal brings increased blood flow to the genitals of the partners and results in the release of feel-good hormones, increased pleasure, and sensitivity to sensations. You can consider foreplay as a sort of appetizer before sex or as an integral part of sex. So, don’t skip on the foreplay, but follow our top tips on hot and heavy foreplay that will result in mind-blowing sex.
Make Foreplay Fun
Men and women get aroused differently, which is why foreplay is very important. It is not just some kisses and touches and getting down to do the deed. Still, foreplay involves flirting, kissing, complementing each other, teasing each other, and even whispering into your partner’s ear. Even if you move to sex, keeping up with foreplay can make the sex steamier and more satisfying for both partners.
Build Sexual Tension
The build-up of sexual tension can be really effective in getting your partner in the mood for sex. It can involve teasing, temptation, and sexy actions, and the longer you do it, the more effective the build-up will be. You can tease each other throughout the entire day and get into a mindless frenzy with the need for sex.
Begin Outside the Bedroom
You can get more spontaneous and initiate some sexy moves even when you are not in the bedroom. A couple of places that come to mind are the kitchen, the garage, or another place you don’t relate to sex. You can either lead your partner to the bedroom for some sex, or you can get down to business right then and there.
Dirty Talk
This is an oldie but goodie, as men are more susceptible to dirty talk and are bound to become aroused if you talk dirty to them. It does not have to be something complicated, as you can start simple and get more creative as you become more comfortable. If you don’t know how to start, you can bring attention to what your partner is doing to you, like “I love it when you lick my neck” or “I love your hands on my chest.” These are simple things, but they bring attention to the actions you like and would like to happen more often. Also, the more you practice, the better you will become, which your partner will truly appreciate.
Dirty Texting/Sexting
Sending sexy texts to your partner is an excellent way to ignite passion and announce what is about to come. If you are uncertain how to start, you can write some tamer texts like explaining what you liked about the last time you had sex with your partner. Or send them a text asking their opinion about a sexy clothing item that they love; a straightforward example is “Should I wear my fuck-me heels to dinner tonight?” Just use your imagination and make your texts as tame or as dirty as you like.
Sexy Dancing
There is a reason why strip clubs and lap dances are popular – these are effective in heightening arousal. Your partner should sit on the bed or a comfortable chair and give them a striptease and a lap dance. Put on some sexy music, and you can simultaneously take your and your partner’s clothes off.
Watch Porn Together
While porn can be tacky and bring unrealistic expectations about sex, it is an effective way to spike arousal. Find an ethical porn clip or put on an arousing movie, as this can help your arousal and set the stage for some steamy sex. Talk with your partner about what you see and what you’d like to try doing to each other.
Sexy Underwear
Sexy underwear is for everyone. No matter what you have on top, wearing sexy lingerie is very empowering, not to mention sexy as hell. We recommend you get well-fitting, sexy underwear and don’t keep them for special occasions only – wear them often and enjoy yourself. Don’t forget to tell your partner that you have a surprise for them under your everyday clothes.
Touch Yourself In Front of Your Partner
Touching yourself in front of your partner can be even better than watching porn, and you can show your partner how you enjoy being pleasured and what feels good for you. You can ask your partner to masturbate in front of you while you touch yourself. It is an erotic, exhibitionistic action that can be a great precursor to sex.
Cool Sensations
Hot and cold sensations can heighten arousal, and you should incorporate these into your foreplay. A simple example to try tonight is to take an ice cube in your mouth before giving oral sex to your partner. If your partner does not enjoy the extreme cold temperature on their genitals, then you can lick their other erogenous zones with a cool tongue.
Sexy Games
There are so many sexy adult games to try, and you can get one and use it for foreplay. It can be a very engaging way to get in the mood, especially with sexy games where you are both required to do some actions like Sexy Truth or Dare and similar games. These can be playful yet effective in sparking arousal.
Shower Together
While sexy books and movies have made it look easy to have sex in the shower, this is not very easy to do. But you can use the shower or bath for foreplay and use the chance to engage in some striptease before you get all wet. Soap and rinse each other, focus on touching and kissing and boosting the intimacy between you.
Heat Up
This is a more advanced foreplay technique, but it is a highly effective one. For this, you will need hot wax or a warming lube that you will use to give a sensual massage to your partner. If you wish to spice things up further, then you can combine hot and cold sensations, like combining hot wax candles and ice cubes or warming and cooling lubes.
Add Toys
Yes, we mean add sex toys to foreplay. After you start getting in the groove, it is time to whip out the toys. You can get a vibrator and focus the vibrations around the erogenous zones, slowly building the anticipation. You can take out your favorite vibrator, tease yourself in front of your partner, and show them what you like and enjoy. You can use the vibrator on your partner while giving them oral pleasure.
Try Role-Play Games
Role-play games have their place in the bedroom, and many couples enjoy the freedom these allow. These can be simple role-play games like wearing a sexy nurse’s costume or playing the sexy handyman or full-on character roles where you need to engage differently with your partner. A popular and very effective role-play game is to play strangers who meet at a bar and end up having dinner, lengthening the foreplay.
Explore Sensation Play
Exploring your partner’s senses can be very effective, which is why we suggest you give sensation play a try. For this, we recommend you get specialized sensation play sex toys that will allow you to manipulate your partner’s senses. Think blindfolds, a tickler, pinwheels, floggers, and other BDSM toys and tools. Also, check out our guide on toys for sensation play.
Discuss Your Fantasies
Because foreplay starts in the brain, you should talk about your sexual fantasies with your partner. Maybe you want to reenact a sexy scene you’ve seen in a movie, so explain this to your partner. Encourage your partner to do the same and explore these further. It can be a simple thing like wearing a specific clothing item, playing a piece of particular music, or explaining a sexy dream in detail.
The Bottom Line
The list above shares our tips on how to use foreplay to boost arousal and ignite the passion between you and your partner. As we explained, foreplay involves focusing on more than simple stimulation of the erogenous zones. Instead, you and your partner should focus on building up arousal and talk about the things that put you in the mood to have sex and the things you both enjoy. Browse a sex toy shop together and choose toys you bth would like to try.