Outercourse
Who says penetration is the main event?
Outercourse: Outercourse means sexual activity that avoids penetration. It covers a wide range of intimate acts that can feel deeply pleasurable and connecting on their own.
Also known as: non-penetrative sex, dry sex, outer sex.
Outercourse is a broad term for any sexual activity between partners that does not involve vaginal, anal, or oral penetration. This includes kissing, touching, mutual masturbation, frottage, grinding, and using toys on or against the body. Many couples find it deeply satisfying as a complete experience rather than just a warm up. It is also a popular choice for people who want to explore intimacy at their own pace.
One of the great things about outercourse is that it carries a much lower risk of sexually transmitted infections compared to penetrative sex, though it is not entirely risk free. Skin to skin contact can still transmit some infections, so it is worth being aware of that. Using body safe toys together can add a whole new layer of fun and sensation. If you feel a bit nervous about trying something new, outercourse is a wonderfully low pressure place to start, with no rush to go further than you are comfortable with.
Types of Outercourse
Outercourse covers many different kinds of intimate activity, so here are some of the most common forms.
- Frottage: Rubbing bodies together, often with clothes on or off, to create pleasurable friction and sensation.
- Mutual Masturbation: Partners touching themselves or each other externally, which is a great way to share pleasure and learn what each other enjoys.
- Grinding: Moving hips together rhythmically, often with clothing on, for stimulation without penetration.
- Sensual Massage: Using hands and touch to explore each other's bodies in a relaxed and intimate way.
- Toy Play: Using body safe vibrators or other couples toys against the skin or erogenous zones without any insertion involved.
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Key things to know
- Outercourse includes any intimate act without penetration, which means there is a huge variety of ways to enjoy it together.
- It carries a lower STI risk than penetrative sex, making it a reassuring option if you are being cautious about sexual health.
- It is a great fit for couples exploring intimacy at their own pace, because there is no expectation to go further than feels right.
- Body safe couples toys can be brought in easily, adding vibration and extra sensation to the experience without any fuss.
- Communication is key during outercourse, so checking in with your partner about what feels good helps everyone have a better time.
FAQ
Is outercourse a good option for beginners?
Absolutely, it is one of the most beginner friendly ways to explore intimacy with a partner. There is no pressure to do anything that feels unfamiliar or uncomfortable. You can take things at your own pace and focus on what actually feels good for both of you.
Can you use sex toys during outercourse?
Yes, and it can be a really fun addition. Body safe vibrators or couples toys used against the skin or erogenous zones work brilliantly in an outercourse context. Just make sure any toy you use is made from a non porous material like silicone, glass, or ABS plastic so it is easy to clean.
Do you need lube for outercourse?
Lube can make many outercourse activities feel much more comfortable and pleasurable, especially if toys are involved. A water based lube is a safe choice that works with most toys and is gentle on skin. Even if penetration is not happening, a little lube can reduce friction and make everything feel smoother.
How do you clean up after outercourse?
If toys were used, wash them with warm water and a dedicated toy cleaner straight after. Wash your hands and any areas of skin that came into contact with body fluids. Keeping things clean is simple and stress free when you make it a regular part of your routine.
Is outercourse completely safe from STIs?
It carries a significantly lower risk than penetrative sex, but it is not entirely without risk. Some infections can pass through skin to skin contact or contact with body fluids. If you have any concerns about sexual health, speaking with a clinician or sexual health professional is always a good idea.
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